Alice and the wonderland
Pursuing the mysterious rainbow bunny in my garden, it led me to a door on a tree stump. Grabbing the cold gold knob I stepped inside without my foot landing on a surface. There I was falling down a tree stump, realizing how it feels to fly. After an hour of falling/ flying, I landed on a black and white checkered floor. In front of me was a regular door but under my feet. Curiously, I opened the door and there it was, the rainbow bunny with a world of wonder behind it. A dream is a wish your heart makes, and this is my dream.
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ReplyDeleteI can see where you got the idea of your story. (Alice in Wonderland) It's really creative but you mixed up the prompt a little so make sure to fix that up. Also, you could just say that you started falling instead of saying that your foot didn't land on a surface. Great choice of words and really creative story. Great job!
ReplyDeleteGood story. It gets a little choppy so I would try to fix that up by reading it out loud. Also, I wouldn't add flying/falling. I think It should be just one of them.
ReplyDeleteI agree with your peers comment that your ideas came from Alice in Wonderland. It can be really challenging to be original and tell your own story when using ideas from another story. I suggest you use your own ideas or be inspired by event that have happened to you. However, well don on your punctuation and use of commas.
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